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School, Decisions, and Waiting.

February 19, 2013


So we have to start thinking about what to do for school for our son.  Hahahahahahaha  who am I kidding?  We have been thinking about school for him since he was 2.  Our original plans were for him to go to a private school. A private school that I even attended when I was in kindergarten and half of first grade before we moved.  It was all set.  He would go there along with his cousins.  It would be awesome!  Then we started seeing the behavior issues.  His running and bolting.  His meltdowns.  And his bursts of energy….. They just aren’t equipped to handle his behavior.  And I certainly don’t want to make school a miserable place for him to be either. So what do we do???  One of the doctors that diagnosed him told us in very clear terms that he would need to be in a classroom setting with other “neurotypical” children due to his very high IQ.  He would regress or rule the class like a king if he was in a class of nothing but children on the spectrum. (I think the KING is the most likely knowing my son)  But, he really needs one on one interactions with the teacher.  I didn’t want to risk placing him in a preschool and having him kicked out.  Making his first school experience negative.  And I knew he would never make it in preschool, let alone “big” school.  Oh it’s not all free help either.  Just getting the diagnosis doesn’t entitle you to all kinds of free therapies, treatments, or schooling.  Nope that is a myth…..   But I had to figure something out.  And let me tell you, it’s like feeling your way around a dark room, with a blindfold and only one shoe on while stepping on a leggo…………


I was able to find a socialization class that would meet 2 days a week for an hour each time.  It was an hour away from our home, but I wanted him to have some kind of positive experience with teachers that knew what they were dealing with!  We treated that class like he was going to school.  He had a backpack, we packed a lunch for the drive up, and we even had some homework (our visualization board).  He loved his teachers and learned so much.  I learned even more.  We did 2 14 week sessions of the class and it was a lifesaver.  When our school district FINALLY got back to us about assessments and help, I sat and thought… what would we have done without the socialization class?  We would have sat around for months with no progress.  There is no sitting around waiting for someone to help, it doesn’t just drop in your lap.  You must go out and find it…. and fight for it…..


Our son is now in a preschool 5 days a week over 5 1/2 hours a day.  It’s through our school district, a specialized high functioning classroom.  He’s in no need of academics.  He even blows the teacher away with what he can do.  He needs to learn to follow the rules, follow the rules and follow the rules!  It’s an uphill climb, but climb it we will.  And everyday we try to make it as positive as possible.  He really likes his teachers (1 teacher 5 aids in the class, and to me that is some awesome ratio numbers) He LOVES the playground.  And he loves riding the bus home.  He tells me everyday when he gets home if he got a happy face or sad face.  He doesn’t lie about it either.  Tells me just why he got a sad face.  Got to love that.  And while I’m thrilled that he loves this class, my mind is swirling  about what to do for Kindergarten.  It’s coming up in 6 or 7 months…..

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I will be totally honest.  Our school district isn’t the best.  The schools are over crowded and the scores aren’t great.  It’s the reason we were so set on the private school back when he was 2.  And to be even more honest, the private school can’t (and probably won’t) deal with my son’s issues.  So we have been looking into charter and magnet schools.  Only issue is, so is everyone else!  So we have him on 2 “lotto” lists for some good schools.  Yes, we have to wait to see if we can get him in to a school…. And then if we do, we have to see what they will do for him.  I have to say that I’m on the edge of my seat waiting to hear.  Which will be in another month.  But so far what I have learned is to have my boxing gloves out.  Get ready to fight… with a sweet smile mind you…. for what is best for this little guy.  You see, he’s so smart, so special, so bright, that I KNOW he is going to be someone so important.  And this decision about schools is huge.  So fingers crossed for us.   Here’s to hoping things will go our way!

  1. We are right there with you on the school thing. We won’t know if our guy is eligible for special ed for another month or so and all of the private schools are coming up on or past application deadlines. Where will he fit in? Can they deal with his extreme anxiety? Would the special ed class be his best option or too limiting? Can his/should his twin sister (NT-ish) be in the same class? And just how are we going to pay for that? Lots of questions, no answers yet. It is so important that school be a positive experience and we have not gotten off to a good start with his “toddler play group” – hoping to turn the corner with preschool….

    Best of luck to you, particularly challenging time of the year.

    • Great points Dawn!!!!! It’ really puts you through a ringer. Lots of sleepless nights. And I’m so happy to hear from others going through the same thing. We are all in this together. 🙂

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